At the risk of being misunderstood (this blog post is not to brag, but to hopefully inform others), I would like to share some advice for the young men out there who are thinking about becoming a responsible man in an adult relationship.
Honestly? I'm writing this series of posts to the twenty year-old me. Pay attention, young D.
Recently, I had the pleasure of grocery shopping with my wife.
I'll repeat that, in case you stumbled over the wording the first time. Recently, I had the pleasure of grocery shopping with my wife.
No, there is nothing wrong with me (well, nothing that relates to grocery shopping, at least).
I actually enjoy this activity.
Would I go so far as to say that I look forward to grocery shopping? Don't be silly, no one loves grocery shopping, do they?
However, the key phrase to consider here is "with my wife."
You see, I actually put effort into my relationship with my spouse. I'm a firm believer that all relationships require effort in order to flourish. But that doesn't mean that the work isn't enjoyable, because it is.
Do I love going to the grocery store? I do not love going to the grocery store.
But I do love my wife, and when WE go to the grocery store together, SHE hates the grocery shopping experience far less.
A very wise friend of mine supplied me with the following equation:
Happy wife = happy life
So, how do you make grocery shopping fun?
Talk. You are captive for a half hour, roaming up and down the aisles. Engage in meaningful conversation with your better half. Better yet, shut your mouth and let her do all the talking - you would be surprised at what invaluable information will come out of the discussion!
Make her laugh. If you have a sense of humor, use it! I try to make every unpleasant situation (aside from firing people) more bearable with a laugh. (Just ask the nurse who was giving me pain meds for my colonoscopy.) It should go without saying (again, I'm writing to my twenty year old self here) that you shouldn't be a complete idiot in the store.
Don't sulk. You may think you're following my advice by simply accompanying your spouse to the grocery store, but if you do go, and you're a grumpy butt, you'll end up making the situation worse. Trust me, you do NOT want to go there (not that I have experience with that - ok, yes I do).
Will going grocery shopping (or, insert undesirable chore here) guarantee that your life will be filled with wedded bliss?
No, no it will not.
However, I can guarantee you that YOU will feel better about the effort you make to keep your relationship healthy. When your partner knows that you are making a meaningful contribution, you are headed in a good direction together.
1 comment:
I think you are right. The best conversations I have had with my young adults is when they were captive. Like when I would drive them to their piano lessons. Good talks and you learn bunches that way.
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